sorry for the hiatus on the blogging front lately. not only has my life been exceptionally busy, but my humor has lacked good inspiration (in the same way my body has lacked sleep). today, however, i have returned with some humorous quotations from the two beautiful girls i babysit on wednesday: riley ellen, age 8, and rachel evelyn, age 4. enjoy this tasty sample from my glorious day w/ the girls.
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riley: my dad is really weird.
me: you think so?
riley: yeah, sometimes he dances like this in the car. {does completely foolish dance}, and then i tell him he's weird and he says, 'i know.'
me: yeah, he's a little weird. but he's a really awesome daddy.
riley: oh yeah, he is awesome and weird. [pause] your dad must be weird too bc he and my dad are buds.
....my favorite parts about this story are... first of all, the thought of her dad dancing in the car reminds me of going on vacation with him when he danced in a bar like patrick swayze in dirty dancing.
secondly, my father's name is keith, and the girls call him keester. which just makes the whole situation more humorous.
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riley: are you tooting?
me: yes.
riley: then i'm going to start calling you mctooty.
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riley: if we don't go outside right now, i'm going to tickle you. and it won't be the good kind.
me: what the heck?
riley: it will be in the armpits.
{little does she know how truly evil that would be!!!}
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rachel: i thought moono was aunt dotty's son?
me: moono is a character on yo gabba gabba. i don't think he's related to us.
rachel: but he's a monster.
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a small child walks into mcdonalds who has long hair and an uncanny resemblance to nicky and alex (uncle jesse's kids) in full house:
rachel goes up to the kid and decides that they are friends.
rachel: so. are you a boy or a girl? take your hat off so i can see.
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rachel: i'm bored. i want to go home.
me: riley's still playing in the play place. maybe you can play with your happy meal toy.
rachel: do you have anything else in your purse to play with.
me: well. i have the Bible and some action figures of Jesus' disciples.
{rachel plays with the action figures for about 20 min till it's time to go home}
me: okay, rach, you wanna carry Jesus' disciples in the car, and i'll put the bible away.
rachel: no. i think i'll just read the Bible on the car ride home.
{about halfway home...}
rachel: winzy, there's no pictures in this Bible.
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and the winner for the quote that made me nearly crack up on the spot.............
me: rachel, you're not getting any cupcakes unless you ask nicely.
rachel: {proceeds with small tantrum}
me: riley, why don't you show your sister how you ask nicely for cupcakes?
riley: may i please have a cupcake, lindsay?
me: sure. see rach? that wasn't so bad, now you try.
rachel: {storms into the house screaming}
me: sigh...i'll give her 2 min to cool off.
riley: man, i wish she would just behave the way i've been behaving for the past two minutes!
more quotations to come!!! what silly things have you heard from the mouths of babes this week?
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